That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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