BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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