They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
