mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize