Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess

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  (248): absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess http://tfl.nu/and5
  Replies (4) Good night (1328) Bad night (382) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  i think my mom watched the whole time

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  (856): i think my mom watched the whole time http://tfl.nu/ceac
  Replies (5) Good night (546) Bad night (4451) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee

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  (404): I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee http://tfl.nu/kgs2
  Replies (28) Good night (2568) Bad night (680)
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  (619): View more from California

  He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.

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  (619): He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting. http://tfl.nu/l79o
  Replies (58) Good night (812) Bad night (3595)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.

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  (610): he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen. http://tfl.nu/e13s
  Replies (241) Good night (822) Bad night (3257) Order T-Shirt
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  (949): View more from California

  the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters

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  (949): the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters http://tfl.nu/l7fh
  Replies (39) Good night (4820) Bad night (833) Order T-Shirt
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  (863): View more from Florida

  you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar

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  (863): you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar http://tfl.nu/o1eu
  Replies (19) Good night (866) Bad night (5091) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.

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  (860): I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared. http://tfl.nu/7yxr
  Replies (13) Good night (5519) Bad night (830) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed

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  (708): sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed http://tfl.nu/38z7
  Replies (25) Good night (10449) Bad night (1166) Order T-Shirt
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers

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  (586): She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers http://tfl.nu/r5er
  Replies (18) Good night (1747) Bad night (6084) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.

  (1-707): View more from California

  is that even a sentence?

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  (707): I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina. (1-707): is that even a sentence? http://tfl.nu/j6fd
  Replies (13) Good night (3086) Bad night (887) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance

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  (919): Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance http://tfl.nu/6t4u
  Replies (2) Good night (2060) Bad night (623) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.

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  (707): there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced. http://tfl.nu/voth
  Replies (28) Good night (1100) Bad night (5070) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.

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  (484): announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention. http://tfl.nu/v327
  Replies (11) Good night (1977) Bad night (362) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME

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  (908): Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME http://tfl.nu/m336
  Replies (18) Good night (2376) Bad night (512) Order T-Shirt

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