remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
