I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
What drink are we having for lunch?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just blew my weed a kiss
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
