Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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