Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
