I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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