You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
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