Your tits are I can't wait for
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
