i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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