apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
