Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to fro yo and sex?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize