Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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