I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
