As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
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