Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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