Dual....:-)
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
