just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Dicks are not precious.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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