Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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