'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
