O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
