We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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