I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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