if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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