Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
