Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
