I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I just cut my nipple shaving
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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