gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
