My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
