Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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