Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
We don't watch enough power rangers
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
