i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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