So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Randomize