I CAN MOONWALK!
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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