Apparently you make a good broom.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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