hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Randomize
