we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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