Don't make out with my wife yet
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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