you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
