I heard we made out
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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