if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
