Christians are straight up FREAKS
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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