Whod you bang
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
