my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Less talking, more tequila
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
