Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize