so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
