I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
My ass is underappreciated
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
