Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
