so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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