I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
